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Executor troubles

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  • Executor troubles

    Hoping someone can give me some advice.

    My mum passed away early last year leaving me as executor and I and my sister as joint beneficiaries. My sister removed everything she could find of any value from my mother's house on the day of my mother's death and freely admitted it although now is denying that she removed anything except the family photographs. I have never received a list of what she took. I do not want any of the jewellery she took but I do want copies of the photos and my sister has been promising these to me for over a year.

    Last year she decided to engage a solicitor who has been making my life an absolute misery. The solicitor has said that I could only have the photos if I gave her client money. It was a struggle to sell the house for enough money to pay off large debts and the amount left over is not a great deal. I have sent a cheque to her now but they then said that I can't have the photos until I provide accounts. I did provide accounts and can account for every penny although I did make a slight mistake on one of the spreadsheets which is easily rectified. But now I have received a response that I can't have the photos until I address where the furniture is (an independent company declared it to have no value and so I paid for its removal), they are disputing my travel costs to take care of the property and costs of the many phone calls I had to make. They are also stating that they have decided that I should pay their fees although the only reason my sister hired them, in my opinion, was because she didn't want to give me the photos.

    And, of course, they say that until I hand over any money that they want they will keep the photos.

    They have also threatened me many times with court. And have threatened it again in this recent mail implying that if I don't reply immediately they will be taking me to court and making me pay the costs for that too.

    What is it that they can actually do? I am so tired of all their demands, threats and bullying. All I want is for them to go away and to give me my photos (which should never have been held to ransom in this way).

    But what should I do? Any advice would be greatly appreciated
    Tags: None

  • #2
    Re: Executor troubles

    I believe it is extraordinary for any genuine solicitor to behave in such a manner. Follow the link in my signature and check if the purported solicitor is genuine.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Executor troubles

      I am so sorry to hear about this awful situation you are experiencing.

      Clearly you and your sister have a very poor relationship.


      On what grounds are they threatening court exactly? This seems like legal bullying and I doubt a judge would view positively the ongoing blackmail over the photos. You are after all merely seeking copies.

      I sense they are bullying you (fuelled by your sister) because they sense you will do/pay anything to get those photos. I feel very angry for you.
      "Although scalar fields are Lorentz scalars, they may transform nontrivially under other symmetries, such as flavour or isospin. For example, the pion is invariant under the restricted Lorentz group, but is an isospin triplet (meaning it transforms like a three component vector under the SU(2) isospin symmetry). Furthermore, it picks up a negative phase under parity inversion, so it transforms nontrivially under the full Lorentz group; such particles are called pseudoscalar rather than scalar. Most mesons are pseudoscalar particles." (finally explained to a captivated Celestine by Professor Brian Cox on Wednesday 27th June 2012 )

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      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Executor troubles

        This is, unfortunately, a genuine solicitor Clever Clogs.

        You are absolutely correct Celestine, my sister is well aware that I do not have any photos of my mother and so i'm desperate for these. We are talking about all of the family photos that belonged to my mum so they cannot be replaced. There is nothing I can do to obtain these photos except beg for them as they have no financial value. The reason they are threatening court is because they now say that my expenses are not correct and they want more money etc. Also that they say I had items removed that should have been part of the estate. I did pay for stuff to be taken and give clothing to charity after confirmation that it had no value but now they say it is important to the estate. But whenever I asked to be given the photos to divide and for a list of what she took from the house I was continually told that because she says that what she took has no value it is not important and I can't have it.
        I think also that they are banking on scaring me. Which , to be honest, they are.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Executor troubles

          dont allow them to scare you.
          No jugde is going to accept a case where a family member is openly blackmailing another one, and this is emotional blackmail, and im pretty sure the solicitor knows it.
          I would suggest a conversation with your local CAB and popping to you doctor regarding the emotional distress this is obviously causing you.

          unless the miscalculations were big, im talking 4 or 5 figures wrong, no one is going to think any the worse of you for making them. You are understandably upset, and if you think of it, even the Inland Revenue mess up with the figures sometimes!
          Did Mum have a solicitor, maybe a word with them will help too.

          sending you hugs and good wishes..

          p

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Executor troubles

            Thanks Puffrose, I will try not to let it get to me.

            I hope a judge sees it that way if it comes to it. I haven't make any mistakes in my workings out. It's what i've charged that is causing the angst. Plumbing costs (I actually have a photo of the blocked toilet though-sad), They say that I can't claim for travel expenses but I had to make a 200 mile round trip to the house every time to check on it and clear it etc. And I did charge interest on all the money i'd paid out so that i'd have the money to copy all the photos when I got the dvd. Plus other bits and pieces they say I can't have the money back for like a gate lock. They are making it sound that they are the people to whom I have to justify my expenses and who can authorise them and if they don't agree they will take me to court and I will then have to pay court costs and their client's costs too.

            I've tried the CAB but they haven't been able to help. Even though this type of situation must be fairly common i'd imagine. Mine isn't the only dysfunctional family in the UK surely!

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Executor troubles

              To add - my workings out are fine - my mistake was just that the funeral expense had been left off the spreadsheet as it was only my sister who had to pay it. I had already paid my share of the funeral costs a long time ago. That's why I say that nothing is wrong with them, all I have to do is add it.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Executor troubles

                Hi Jellybaby, I see you made it over here hun, as I said there's lovely people over here and they will be able to advise you along the way.
                (((((Hugs))))) from me.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Executor troubles

                  All I can think of is, if its sheer greed (which from reading this it is) I suggest contacting these guys

                  SRA | Contact us | Solicitors Regulation Authority


                  they are for complaints about someone else's solicitors, and encouraging people to keep personal effects to ransom to my mind is wrong and non professional.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Executor troubles

                    Thank you sapphire for the recommendation of the site.

                    Puffrose, thanks very much, I had never heard of this organisation. I will try giving them a call whilst on break tomorrow.

                    If nothing else I can look forward to being somewhat proactive. I've just taken everything they've thrown at me for a long time

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Executor troubles

                      hopefully they can help you..

                      Personally I would contact a solicitor and see abou a counter claim for emotional distress hun, its a last resort I know, but it might scare your sister off an get you the pictures..

                      big hugs to you

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Executor troubles

                        Just as an update. I have contacted the SRA and I will be making a formal complaint about the solicitor's bullying and unprofessionalism in holding items of sentimental value to ransom.

                        I'm hoping that while it runs it's course I can have some breathing space to decide what to do next. Which I still have no clue about

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Executor troubles

                          concerntrate on healing.

                          Take time to greive and to thing of the GOOD things, i didnt when i lost someone i loved and im still suffering for it. Take time to be you.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Executor troubles

                            Just a thought.

                            The OP is both the executor & a beneficiary.

                            With the 'executor cap' on, there is a duty to carry out the deceased's wishes as expeditiously as possible.
                            If another interested party's solicitor is unfairly obstructing this , I believe that a complaint can be made to the Probate Court.

                            Have a read - see what you reckon
                            http://www.lawsociety.org.uk/documen...%20matters.pdf
                            CAVEAT LECTOR

                            This is only my opinion - "Opinions are made to be changed --or how is truth to be got at?" (Byron)

                            You and I do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.
                            Cohen, Herb


                            There is danger when a man throws his tongue into high gear before he
                            gets his brain a-going.
                            Phelps, C. C.


                            "They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!"
                            The last words of John Sedgwick

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: Executor troubles

                              Originally posted by Jellybaby View Post
                              I'm hoping that while it runs it's course I can have some breathing space to decide what to do next. Which I still have no clue about
                              Is your sister married?

                              Comment

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